Autobiographical

After a carefree year teaching at the school complex near Sofia Antipolis in the south of France and working there in the summer basking in the sun, the return to England in September 1986 was marked by rain and cloudy weather yet again. The time abroad had an adverse impact, in particular, on my Russian that I hadn’t practiced or studied for a year. Admittedly, I was no longer that worried about French, although I had a lot of novels and essays that I need to read to catch up in both languages. 

It was indeed a strange time and indicative of the negative influence of the five-year course, albeit supplemented by the highlights of the year in France and three months in the USSR. I was overcome by a sense of loss as the camaraderie of the previous period was gone. Russell and Phil had already completed their courses, making their way in the world, as had my close friend Nats. Similarly, I didn’t really know any of the students on the French course and only knew one guy also studying for the same period as me, completing a combined German and Russian degree, former soldier Tony. He could be amusing on occasion, but was let down by sexist views and his habit of expounding ultra-Thatcherite propaganda. 

I suppose the only benefit was the lack of domestic distractions, offset by the long-lasting international liaison. Indeed, Robin came over for Christmas in Richmond while my parents were in Saint Quentin, and I would reciprocate with a month with her during the Easter break, with part of the time in Minnesota at the house of her parents, interacting as well as with her brother Raleigh, and spending the rest studying in Madison when Robin was taking courses for her arts degree.

Looking back now, I realise that I should have started proactively searching for work in my free time as in that case it is highly likely that I would not have wasted several months or even a year in various positions that hardly boosted my career or earnings. I ascribe this failing and lack of forethought to youth and naivety. It was also probably the one period when I went out the least, spending as I did a lot of time with my parents and assisting them with various family issues as best I could. 

Notwithstanding the lack of outings, I constantly felt short of time, trying to balance essays and revision for both languages, and completing the various projects for the additional voluntary paper I did in French proficiency, which involved primarily comparing the bias in the country’s right-wing and left-wing press.  

Then I took mocks which went OK, followed shortly afterwards by the worst part – the exams marked by external examiners. If I failed them, that was it – five years down the drain. I remember leaving the final Russian language paper a few minutes early and noting how a maths student had left one remark on his form, penning the note “three wasted years”. He had departed after just 15 minutes. I hope things worked out for him in the long run.

I was far luckier in that respect, obtaining a 2:1 in the BA Combined Honours Degree in French and Russian, obtaining a first in Russian, but let down by my French where I missed a first by 1%. This was definitely something that I hadn’t expected when I started the course, all the more so after the time in France. 

And as had been the case when I had left school, I recall experiencing a profound sense of emptiness and regret as I walked out of the building after completing the final exam and trudging down Mile End Road that sombre Thursday for the last time. 

On the one hand, I felt incredibly lucky to have been able to devote five years to a wonderful period of internal development, to have seen two countries from different perspectives, and to have had the good fortune to have met so many good and kind people, a number of whom I was to stay in touch with and see at a later date.

On the other hand, the future was unknown and I didn’t feel that sure of myself. I wish my friend Russell had already been offering in 1987 his successful consulting courses on coaching people in confidence, as I would definitely have learned a lot and probably engineered a very successful career on the back of that support. 

I had absolutely no idea whatsoever how things would pan out. I didn’t know what job to do, I hadn’t a clue where to look and doubted that anyone would be remotely interested in a young language graduate. In short I was totally unprepared. I probably should have heeded my dad’s advice then and applied to do an MA and then a doctorate, but I was driven by other pressures to start earning money. Money was of the essence, as it has been ever since.

I would offer now the following words of wisdom to my previous self, or more usefully to anyone graduating or to anyone whose children are currently in the throes of studies who might possibly be perusing this blog: Work as much as you can while at university, so that you are able to draw on some experience and have employment references to offer potential employees, preferably in retail or another people business, try to arrange interviews in your final year and also consider apprenticeships. And nowadays, above all look at careers where automation is unlikely, such as construction, teaching, nursing and social care.